I know we don't have a lot of newlyweds on the site yet but I thought that this was worth bringing up. The Knot posted this article a couple weeks ago about "The Postwedding Blues." https://www.theknot.com/content/post-wedding-blues-tips-for-dealing/?utm_source=theknot.com&utm_medium=email&utm_content=stage2&utm_campaign=post-wedding
It's not something you really think about when you're wrapped up in the excitement (or stress) of planning the wedding but I've definitely been struggling with this since the wedding.
In the first couple days after the wedding, you're definitely wrapped up in reliving every moment and talking to your guests about what everyone liked best but after that, I started to second guess things. Even though I know in the moment that it was the happiest day of my life and that I loved every minute, I can't help but have regrets. You try your hardest to plan for every possibility but you can't control everything! (especially other people) For example, we were running late to the ceremony and my mom was saying "don't worry, they'll wait for the bride!" but I was trying to explain to her that we only had so much time after the ceremony before the sun set to get pictures. It ended up working out because my aunt and cousin were SUPER late and if we had started on time, they would have walked in and disrupted the ceremony but still, we were later than expected and didn't get to take pictures in all the locations we scouted.
I have so many regrets about things that I couldn't control and it's so frustrating that you only get one chance! I wish I hadn't ugly cried all the way down the aisle. I wish we didn't have a projection screen in the background of our ceremony pictures. I wish that we'd taken more pictures in different locations. I wish the dinner service hadn't taken so long so we'd had more time to dance. I wish I'd been able to get in the photobooth more. I wish I'd eaten more cake and more poutine. (That was a very common regret in my family haha!)
When we got the photos back, I thought that that would bring back the feelings I had from the wedding but I actually felt upset and disappointed after seeing them. They are BEAUTIFUL pictures and she gave us more than 800 photos but I still felt unsatisfied. It just seemed to bring into focus all the things that went "wrong."
I've been trying to figure out why I can't shake this feeling and I think my husband finally figured it out. Our wedding was so much fun, so perfect that it's unrealistic to expect a picture to be able to hold all of that. It's too much pressure and there's no way that they're going to be able to perfectly capture all of that. We sat down with my family over the holiday and showed them all the photos. Seeing it through their eyes helped me put things into perspective and feel better. No matter what went "wrong," none of the guests noticed and they all had a wonderful time.
It's still a work in progress but I'm trying to keep in mind the way I felt on the day of the wedding and to focus on moving forward with the things that got put on hold until after the wedding. I recommend leaning on your new husband or wife about how you're feeling so that you can work on it together. If you can, you should make a journal entry on the day after the wedding (or a couple days after) so you can remember all the things you loved and document that excitement to look back on!
Hopefully this won't happen to you after the wedding but if it does, apparently it's normal and you're not alone! Feel free to reach out if you need support!
