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Cherry
Devoted October 2019 Quebec

Who's paying what?

Cherry, on November 23, 2018 at 19:04 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 33

Hello fellow brides, I seek advises on the cost of wedding please. I want to know who is actually paying for what.

Here's my scenarios right now.

Engagement ring. Fiance was paying.

Wedding ring. Who's paying? Since he won't be wearing his wedding ring on daily basis due to the nature of his work, he said he just need something below $200. I, on the other hand, is looking at something closer to $1000 to match my engagement ring.

Wedding dress and make up. I am and will be paying.

Bride maids dresses. They will be paying but I will be paying for their make up.

Groom's tuxedo and Best Men. Fiance will be paying cause the Best Men will be his sons.

Photographer and Videograher. Split?

Wedding invitation and favours. Split?

Ceremony and Reception dinner. Since 80% of the guests will be from his side of family, do we split 50/50?

Honeymoon. We will split.

How do you manage your wedding expenses?

Thank you in advance.

33 Comments

Latest activity by Donna, on February 8, 2019 at 20:40
  • Donna
    Devoted July 2019 Ontario
    Donna ·
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    Well so far I have paid for cake, flowers, my wedding dress, both Party gifts for Bridesmaids & Groomsmen, I be paying 75.00 towards 2 bridesmaid dresses and being for one. I just paid for my ring bearers dresses, shoes their twin girls. I will be paying for his Wedding band, my hair, makeup, fiance' is paying for the hall, meal plan for our guests and bar . He is also paying for the Limo. But I will help out. Honeymoon is not till a later date

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  • Meghan
    Devoted April 2019 Ontario
    Meghan ·
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    We were super lucky and my parents are paying for about a third of everything.

    My Mom bought my dress.

    Fiancé and I split most everything else from our joint account.

    He bought my engagement ring.

    I paid for bridesmaids gifts/he paid for groomsmen gifts

    My bridesmaids paid for their dresses (less $50 each which I contributed towards) and they will also pay for their hair and make up (though I will cover the tip)

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  • A
    Curious June 2019 British Columbia
    Amber ·
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    Everything was shared expenses for us, or splitting it wherever we can. My spouse and I have a joint savings account we dump extra money into plus a set savings plan (about $150 biweekly for me and $175 biweekly from him, based on our incomes to be fair) that we are using to cover the majority of expenses from our wedding. Here is the breakdown so far for us:


    Engagement ring and Wedding Rings - Fiance bought mine (he bought the wedding ring at the same time as the engagement, so that it would match), and I will be buying his

    Wedding dress and make up - I was SUPER lucky and my MiL/FiL paid for my wedding dress! I'll pay for the alterations and make up myself. Alterations and make up may come from the joint account

    Bride maids dresses- My MoH says she will pay for her own for sure, with one of my bridesmaids though I may help out or pay for it myself.

    Groom's tuxedo and Best Men -Fiance wants to buy a suit, that is coming from the joint account. His best men will be buying or renting their own.

    Photographer and Videograher - From the joint account

    Wedding invitation and favours -Technically we split it, since we each bought half the invitations. Favours probably from the joint.

    Ceremony and Reception dinner - Also 80% of his family is the guests, but we are doing it from the joint

    Honeymoon- have not planned that yet, but split/ from the joint.

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  • Candace
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Candace ·
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    Anything that is specifically for him he is paying for (like his tux, groomsmen gifts, boutonniere, etc) and the same for whatever is for me (dress, bouquets, hair/makeup, etc).

    For the photographer I wanted to get the largest package offered so we are splitting the base cost and I am paying the difference for the upgrade.

    Everything else we are splitting half and half.

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  • Amanda
    Frequent user September 2021 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    We are splitting it. It only makes sense since we are doing this for each other.

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  • T
    Curious April 2019 Ontario
    Trish ·
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    Everything split between us except my second dress...I'm assuming the cost for this since I want it.

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  • Cherry
    Devoted October 2019 Quebec
    Cherry ·
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    Thank you for the sharing. After I posted the questions and received few advises from fellow brides, I had discussion with Fiance. We now both agreed that all will be split 50/50 except for my dress and the bridesmaids dresses and makeup which I will pay and he will pay for his Bestmen tuxedo.

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  • Cherry
    Devoted October 2019 Quebec
    Cherry ·
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    Thank you for the information, Emily. My Fiance is in construction. It's not safe to wear any accessories at all cause it might catch on something. But he said he will wear it when he's not working. Smiley smile

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  • Elizabeth
    Frequent user September 2020 Ontario
    Elizabeth ·
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    It'll vary from one couple to the next. I think it depends on what you and your fiance's personal finances are. However I generally think that, if you have similar income, everything should be split 50/50. That doesn't necessarily include the rings. If you don't already share financial responsibilities you will be after the knot is tied. HOWEVER, that being said, if you two have different expectations for the wedding the balance may reflect that.

    The guest list for example. If all of your guests have a similar relationship to the two of you (like friends or family) I would suggest splitting that 50/50 even if most of the guests are from one side. But if you're only inviting your family and your fiance is inviting family AND friends AND work associates then you may want to talk to your fiance about paying for their friends and work associates.

    This can be applied to any vendor too. Like if you want a DJ that does lights and special effects but your fiance really only wants music, you may want to foot the additional cost.

    With the exception of the rings my fiance and I are splitting everything 50/50. However all the payments are going through me. I have more in my savings and better credit so I am in a better position to put together down payments. We're both putting money away monthly and the wedding is over a year and a half away so we shouldn't have to rely on my credit.

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  • Emily
    Devoted February 2020 Ontario
    Emily ·
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    I am not sure if anyone has mentioned it yet, but we just bought my FH a silicon ring, because he can't wear a metal ring due to his line of work. Enso has great rings for 39.99 American - maybe something to consider?

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  • Katrin
    Frequent user September 2019 Ontario
    Katrin ·
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    Sounds pretty reasonable to me. I think it also depends on how much you both make... My fiancé makes about double I do, so she paid for 2/3 and I paid for a third. Her wedding ring costs about $60, mine was $1200 and she paid for most of my ring and I paid for hers. We are trying to split the costs where we are able, but I think you should take into consideration your earnings (in comparison to each other)...

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  • Kaisha
    Super March 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kaisha ·
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    Engagement ring. He paid

    Wedding ring. He is paying for both, he also can not wear his ring every day due to work. At the moment he only has a silicone ring.

    Wedding dress and make up. My mom bought my wedding dress and my bridesmaid will do my makeup.

    Bride maids dresses. They bought the dresses and will do makeup for themselves. I plan on paying for hair.

    Groom's tuxedo and Best Men. We do not have a best man and my FH will buy a nice suit, not a tux.

    Photographer and Videograher. He paid for the photographer, we will not have a videographer.

    Wedding invitation and favours. I paid for invitations and my mom is making our favours.

    Ceremony and Reception dinner. I paid for ceremony he is covering reception.

    Honeymoon. He paid for majority of this but my flight was paid for so that was a bonus.

    How do you manage your wedding expenses? We sat down and set a budget. He is covering 70% and I am covering 30%. He makes a lot more money then I do so this worked for us.

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  • Cherry
    Devoted October 2019 Quebec
    Cherry ·
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    Seems like most couples are doing 50/50. Thank you all for sharing.

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  • Phaidra
    Frequent user October 2019 Alberta
    Phaidra ·
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    Heyo,
    We're paying for this wedding 50/50. We have a year and a half engagement before our day, so we've each been pitching towards our wedding account, everything we pay for the wedding is coming out of there. We're also fortunate that we have some extra cash flow from each side of our family. I think the only thing that isn't split is my engagement ring, which he purchased for me.
    I think the 50/50 split makes it much more manageable, and (may) be your first big expense together so it kind of makes sense to share it. Smiley smile

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  • Amanda
    Super June 2019 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    Hello.

    We are splitting everything. We're putting all costs on our line of credit and each making equal payments towards everything.

    Obviously same as you, my engagement was paid for by my fiance.

    We intend on buying each other's rings - however I see your issue as ours both cost the same. I think you two just need to sit down and decide what you're both comfortable with.

    I also will be paying for my bridesmaid's make up but not dresses.

    Aside from that, everything else will be split. Basically aside from the engagement ring we will be as close to equal as possible.

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  • W
    Newbie September 2019 British Columbia
    Wyatt ·
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    I am not a bride, I am the groom, but we have an odd solution. I am paying for the wedding, ceremony, reception, invitations, her wedding ring and my wear. She is making her dress and her bridesmaids dress. She is paying for the honeymoon. We are making the costs to eachother equal as possible in the end, with the exception of the band I am getting her which we aren't including in the split. In these days I feel an equal split is only right.
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  • Donna
    Devoted July 2019 Ontario
    Donna ·
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    Since this is my second Wedding I didn't ask my parents for anything, my fiancee' he is paying for the following: My wedding ring set, limo, Hall, for his own rental on his tuxdeo , bestman & groomsmen are paying their own. Paying for the Minister,

    Fiancee's neice will be taking our photographs (free) A friend of mine son DJ (FREE)

    since our Wedding is outside the Country home owner also a friend of mine (free)

    Be paying for extra together.

    Together we will be paying for the caterer.

    I will be paying I have my wedding dress since June of this year, paying for his ring watch my fiancee' won't be able to wear to work, I have most of my 2 tier cake paid off, flowers, MY girls are all paying for their dresses, makeup daughter is doing it, hair my daughter in laws mom will be doing my hair, etc

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  • Sharlene
    Expert August 2019 Alberta
    Sharlene ·
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    50/50 for all expenses, except for my engagement ring. We have part time jobs for the wedding expenses and the funds from the job goes into a joint account. It is working great. Our food and beverage contract is paid off in full. Now we are working on paying the cost of the photographer in full. Next up is the videographer and so on. After putting deposits down on the vendors we decided to pay off the largest expense in full first, then onto the second largest expense and so on. Our wedding is over 8 months away and such a relief to be on track with payments.

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  • Catherine
    Frequent user July 2020 Quebec
    Catherine ·
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    He paid the engagement ring.
    For the wedding bands he will probably buy mine, and me his.
    Church: my dad
    Cake: my mom
    For the rest of the wedding expenses (dress, venue, etc) it will be me. We bought a condo which is buying built and will be ready in 1 year. My FH already put a down payment, but we agreed that he is going to keep saving to minimize our mortgage when we sign, and I will take care of the wedding. Both our parents are likely to give us some extra help than what was already mentionned, but we will probably use it for the honeymoon. We are not counting on it, and are assuming we are paying for it all without help.
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  • Cherry
    Devoted October 2019 Quebec
    Cherry ·
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    Thank you all for sharing. My Fiance and I do not have joined account and do not have intention to open one. Each of us managing our own finances. However, every month he transferred me some money for living expenses as we are doing 50/50 on this.

    I guess, I know what to do now. Really appreciate all the comments. We will just split 50/50 on the wedding rings, reception cost, photographer and honeymoon. Smiley smile

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  • Maegan
    Super July 2018 British Columbia
    Maegan ·
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    This is exactly what we did and it worked great!
    Only difference is that I paid for all my bridesmaids dresses and my husband paid for all his groomsmens outfits... we just hadn’t saved enough in the account at the point to cover those expenses.
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  • Peggy
    Super May 2019 Alberta
    Peggy ·
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    My fiancé and I run our finances as one. For us, there is no 'who's paying' conversation - both of our paychecks go into the same account. I take care of all our finances (I'm an accounting professional, so...yeah) - but keep him up to date on what we've paid for so far (as well as what other bills we paid out of each pay period).

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  • Heather
    Curious September 2020 Manitoba
    Heather ·
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    Me and my fiancé are just putting a certain amount each into a joint account every month and paying stuff from that account for the wedding. So pretty much 50/50.
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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    For me and my Fiancé we just started living together as one and treat it like any other bill. We have now bought a house, have a joint bank account and other stuff, and a dog and cat Smiley tongue He does make more than me but I have saved my money since my first job 4 years ago when I was 17 so we are about even as of right now. IMO it makes it a lot easier to become one. (Only thing so far that isn't being payed for by the two of us is my wedding dress because my Dad insists on footing the bill.)


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  • Robyn
    Super June 2019 Ontario
    Robyn ·
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    He and I are splitting all the costs except for the dress, which my mom generously paid for, and the Lebanese zaffe dancers, which his parents are paying for.
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  • Kelsie
    Master July 2021 Ontario
    Kelsie ·
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    50/50 aside from my engagement ring and the contributions from both of our parents!
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    We’re splitting everything (not including my engagement ring). Anything that was gifted from parents and whatnot is great, but we’re in this together so it doesn’t matter who is inviting more guests or not; we split everything.
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  • Dar
    Frequent user December 2018
    Dar ·
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    Everything was split 50/50 including my engagement ring. We have literally just put everything into our splitwise app as it gets paid for. That being said, my FH earns quite a bit more than I do, so if something out of my budget comes up, it’s an honest conversation and if he really wants it, he covers more of the cost.
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  • Gabrielle
    Frequent user May 2019 Ontario
    Gabrielle ·
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    1. Engagement ring he paid,
    2. Wedding rings: my rings came as a set that interlock so that was easy, and i got him the ring he wanted which was only 200$.
    3. My dress was a gif from my mom and i will be paying for my own makeup and hair.
    4. My bridesmaids paid their dresses and hair/makeup but i found them some great deals on savings to help.
    5. Groom and his best men will be renting their own tuxes.
    6. All other wedding costs (favours, invites, decor) is split 50/50
    7. I am paying the venue and food and my fiance covered the cost of our honeymoon
    8. Our flower girl is his daughter and my biece so i covered the cost of the dresses
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  • Natalie
    Devoted July 2020 Ontario
    Natalie ·
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    He bought my engagement ring and his wedding ring at the same time but I would have preferred to pay for it. I’m trying to discuss the option of us splitting my wedding ring.
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  • Natalie
    Devoted July 2020 Ontario
    Natalie ·
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    We split the ceremony and reception costs.

    The transportation (we are renting luxury SUVS so we can use them for longer than the day) will be paid for by his family.

    I pay for my dress and makeup/ hair as well as the bridesmaids makeup; but they’re doing their own hair.

    He pays for his suit.


    Bridesmaids and groomsmen pay for their own outfits and we both pay for our parties gifts.

    My my mom has agreed to contribute 10k but that wasn’t expected so that will go to reception costs.
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  • Michelle
    Expert April 2019 Alberta
    Michelle ·
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    We split all ceremony/reception/invitations EVERYTHING basically, except he is buying both of my rings, i bought his ring, and Im buying my attire and makeup and stuff and he is buying his. It kind of evens out though his ring is cheaper than both mine, because my dress, hair, makeup, undergarments, shoes, jewellery all cost more than what he is wearing day of.

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