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Jennifer
Super August 2018 Alberta

Wedding Shower

Jennifer, on March 7, 2018 at 00:06 Posted in Before the wedding 0 21
Just wondering how many brides are out there who aren’t having a shower? I told my MOH I don’t think I want one (she has offered to throw me one) We’re going to do the bachelorette party but a friend told me today I have to have a shower it’s one of the best parts of the whole experience. I just feel so bad about all the fuss over me. We had an engagement party plus there’s the wedding itself then to add the shower and bachelorette party seems like so much to me. What’s everyone’s thoughts on having a wedding shower or not?

21 Comments

Latest activity by Maya, on March 8, 2018 at 21:28
  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    I think I will have a shower but not an engagement party. It does seem like there is a lot of fuss and party’s to plan.

    I want to have a stag and doe party and then my FH aunt wants to throw us a shower and then if I have a bachelorette party then that’s already 3 parties and each time it will take a lot of planning and money.
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  • S
    Newbie April 2019 Ontario
    Sydney ·
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    I’m not having a shower. I don’t like the fuss either plus our wedding is small. We want to focus on just planning the wedding.
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  • M
    Expert July 2018 Alberta
    Marina ·
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    I am not doing a shower. I come from EU and it is simply not part of our traditions.

    i am also not doing bachelorette, as I do not see the point. Maybe I will just gather a few friends and go to a wine bar or a bistro, have a dinner and a couple of glasses of wine and come home to my partner Smiley smile
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  • Erin
    Master September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·
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    I didn't have one. I agree with you about all the fuss and expense that is unnecessary. No engagement party either. It would have been a lot of events for us to fit into a short time frame. We got engaged December 25, 2016 and were married September 30, 2017. Trying to fit in all the planning plus all those events would have been crazy!

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  • Jennifer
    Super August 2018 Alberta
    Jennifer ·
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    Love that idea!
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  • Courtney
    Super July 2018 Ontario
    Courtney ·
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    Wedding Showers don't NEED to be done. I didn't want one either as I really just don't need all those gifts.

    I've asked people to not bring gifts, but if they REALLY want to do something, then to give me their favourite book since I love reading.

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  • Jen
    VIP June 2018 Ontario
    Jen ·
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    I'm not having either by the sounds of it. My FMIL had talked about planning a shower for me but nothing has come of it and we have 3 months until they day and they live nearly 8 hours from us. I don't think it's a big deal if you have one or not.

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  • Jessica
    Super March 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    I did not do a bridal shower. My mom and MOH wanted to plan one for me, but I live out of province, and didn't want to fly in for a weekend just for it. I told them to skip it. We already had an engagement party with my side of the family and my MOH hosted my bachelorette. I think that was plenty and didn't find it necessary (besides I wouldn't be able to bring the gifts back on the plane with me).

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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    My co-moh’s already know that they only want to do a bachelorette. My mom may throw me a bridal shower, but I live far away from most family/friends that would go it’s logistcally not worth is to me
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  • Jennifer
    Super August 2018 Alberta
    Jennifer ·
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    Lol yes so true!
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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    I think showers are losing their usefulness, people are already buying gifts for the wedding. It feels redundant to me to have a bridal shower, but baby showes I totally get lol
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  • Jennifer
    Super August 2018 Alberta
    Jennifer ·
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    Thanks so much ladies! I totally understand the difference between the bachelorette and the shower and I know you’re not typically supposed to throw yourself one haha my MOH did offer to I just feel like it’s all so much especially since the bachelorette costs money and ppl bring gifts to the wedding maybe doing a shower with out gifts would make me feel better about it! I must have issues with all the attention! Lol thanks again 😊
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  • Candace
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Candace ·
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    We are doing a destination Bachelorette so only my wedding party is coming to that so we are having a bridal shower for my family and friends to attend and celebrate with me
    In my experience the bachelorette is a night out or something with friends , it's a party, and the bridal shower is where people bring gifts. I've never been invited to a bachelorette and been expected to bring a gift
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  • Cathrine
    Devoted April 2018 Ontario
    Cathrine ·
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    My family wanted to throw me one so I’m having a bridal shower. They are excited about it so I don’t want to take that away from them. However, I made sure only to invite people who are also invited to the wedding as it seems rude to invite to a shower but not the main event.
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  • Emily
    Devoted November 2018 Ontario
    Emily ·
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    In my experience, a shower is just a nice thing that your mom, friends, mother-in-law, etc. Host and plan (and pay for) for you. You shouldn't feel that you have to throw yourself one.
    We were maybe going to have a Housewarming Party instead of a bridal shower, since most of what you get at a shower is usually house stuff any way, and I'm sure as heck not going to be the only one using the stuff! This way too my Fiance is there to taking some of the pressure off me.

    If someone wants to throw you one though you should let them. I have the same feelings about people fussing over me, but ultimately it's just a super nice thing, put on by people who love you Smiley smile
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  • Natalie
    Frequent user June 2018 Ontario
    Natalie ·
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    I’m not having one! It was a combination of not wanting the attention, not wanting to spend money on so many things related to my wedding and also being in my 40s and living with my fiancé for 5 years - we have all the stuff we need. Don’t feel pressured, this is supposed to be about you and how you want to make it. Smiley smile
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  • T
    Frequent user August 2018 British Columbia
    Terri ·
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    I am just doing a bachelorette. The shower is nice just in case the bachelorette is somewhere like Vegas and not everyone can come. Other than that I don’t really see the point.
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  • Alexandra
    VIP November 2019 British Columbia
    Alexandra ·
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    You really don’t have to have a shower. I’m probably going to skip the shower myself. There’s so many different parties now that you really don’t need to have all them, there’s a lot of flexibility to choose.
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  • Stephanie
    Master July 2018 Alberta
    Stephanie ·
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    I think they are optional nowadays. I don’t like being the centre of attention either so when my friend offered to throw one I asked for it to be a couples shower so my fiancé would be there to take the attention of me (he loves it!)

    I think you can skip it! If you’re MOH is set on throwing you one, you can ask that it be casual and people don’t bring gifts, or bring donations for a certain charity. My friend did that and it was a huge success!

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  • M
    Curious August 2018 Manitoba
    Modupe ·
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    You shouldn't be the one to plan the shower, for all the bridal showers have been to it's was a surprise for the bride from her bridesmaids. I'm planning one for my best frd next month.
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  • Chantell
    Newbie October 2018 British Columbia
    Chantell ·
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    Im not having one either. I feel its unnecessary as everyone I would invite to the bachelorette, I would invite to the bridal shower.

    Everyone feels obligated to buy you something for all the events and its just too much. Also Im not one for a lot of awkward games, so that might be part of it too.
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