Expert March 2018 Ontario

Speeches at the recpetion

Ashley, on 13/September/2017 at 09:16 Posted in Wedding reception


We have a large bridal party and it seems a lot of them want to do a speech, but my FH and I had allowed time for a speech from my sister and his brother (MOH and Best Man), from each of our parents, and ourselves. I have my two best friends hint that they want to do a speech and my FH groomsmen have hinted that some of them want to do a speech. How do I say no, or how can I give them a different option?


14 Replies

  • Vinod
    VIP August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod Online ·
    I was in a case where i had no idea how many speeches were going to be said. Final count came down 4 people. 2 MOD amd myself though i forgot about 1 BM.

    If you have many speeches, keep it 2 minutes per person so that your parents and FH have more time to give theirs.
  • Valérie
    Expert September 2019 Quebec
    Valérie ·

    If you are having a rehearsal dinner and/or a brunch the next morning, you could suggest that they give their speeches then?

  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    View quoted message

    That is a really great alternative for me to give my bridal party! Thank you so much!

  • Becca
    Curious October 2019 Ontario
    Becca ·

    I saw something at a wedding once that i thought was a beautiful idea.

    One of the bridesmaids had a speech prepared but they ran out of time and she was unable to do it. So she deiced to film herself doing the speech the next day and she sent it the video to the Bride and Groom. I thought it was a beautiful idea, the speech was really touching and felt intimate (because she filmed it in her living room lol) and it was so nice that they had that recording of her words to watch the next day!

    If you want to limit speeches then you could always ask your wedding party to make a video. Your excuse can be that you want to be able to look back on it forever (and how can they say no to that? lol)

  • Jen
    Featured June 2018 Ontario
    Jen ·

    I agree with previous posts giving them an allotted time amount for the speeches. That way they don't feel like they're dragging on all night.

  • Sonja
    VIP September 2017 Ontario
    Sonja ·

    If you calculate 5 minutes per speech, you're already at 25 minutes. Now 4 or 5 other people want to say something too. You're now up to 50 minutes of people talking. If I were a guest, I think it would get boring. I like the idea of giving the others an opportunity to give a toast. That's only about a minute or 2 each and it can be woven throughout the dinner.

  • Andrew
    Curious October 2018 Ontario
    Andrew ·

    One idea is to have a few speeches early on and then the others between dinner courses.

  • Ashley
    Super June 2018 Alberta
    Ashley ·

    Limit them to a toast later on in the night, especially if speeches is before dinner is served. People get hangry

  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·

    I may steal the toast idea that if the remaining members of the bridal party wanted to speak they can do a toast for us instead. Thank you everyone!

  • Lynnie
    Administrator October 2016 North Carolina
    Lynnie ·

    What about at the rehearsal dinner? We had a ton of our bridesmaids and groomsmen give a quick speech at the rehearsal dinner, and kept our wedding toasts to just my dad, the best man, and the MOH!

  • Erin
    Featured September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·

    I think you can just say that you don't want to have too many speeches as most people get bored and you have planned everything for the evening only taking into account the speeches that are already planned.

  • Chelsea
    Master August 2017 Ontario
    Chelsea ·
    I also had a BM want to give a speech, but we told her that we went over everything with the dj, including the list of speeches and there just wasn't going to be time for her to give one. She wrote the speech just in case and gave it to me on her own time!
  • Ap2017
    Super September 2017 Ontario
    Ap2017 ·

    We have a small bridal party so this was sort of an issue for us. We are limiting to BM/MOH, parents and us for speeches. Anyone else is welcome to do sort of a joint toast (which usually only takes about 10 seconds, lol).

  • Maegan
    Super July 2018 British Columbia
    Maegan ·
    It was the same for us...wehave 3 groomsen thatREALLY want to talk but we already have best man, maid of honour and both families talking. So we told them they have to do their speech together and they have a 5 min time cap! That way they will have to carefully plan what they want to say to cordinate with each other in the time limit so they cant just get up there and ramble.

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