Requesting a Covid Test for Wedding Attendance

So this thread did not age well at all. Testing is now appointment based only for those with symptoms. And not only are certain regions slammed with insane covid case counts, some health units like Toronto Public Health will stop contact tracing because they're slammed with the number of positive cases.

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Thanks but we're not looking for a caterer. We signed with our venue based on the food packages they offer.

Hey,


I got married on August 29th..we postponed from June 20th because we could not get our marriage licence. Once everything opened we were able to secure an amazing caterer that put my whole backyard reception together (rentals and all) in the matter of a few weeks. I highly recommend Saucy Affairs (they are based in Toronto). They have a covid care package with a covid officer that shows up to take temperatures and make sure everyone is staying safe. If you are worried I highly recommend contacting them. Awesome food, awesome service, awesome experience..amazing wedding day!

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If we do this, we'd be asking our vendors to do it as well.

As long as you’re in the provincial guidelines you should be fine. Those weddings were big numbers and no guidelines were taken place.
Even if you ask your guest to take a test and you feel everyone is safe. There’s always a chance that the hall servers could have it or maybe a missed cleaned surface..... it’s to tricky to really know how you got it.

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The weird thing is, I have a feeling certain family members will be the ones who make a fuss about taking the test. All of my friends would be completely supportive. Family members have a way of overreacting and acting crazy at other people's weddings.

And yes, if I were to go through with this, it would be a condition listed on the invite to RSVP yes.

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Pretty much my mindset. I feel like anyone who actively refuses to take the test is likely not taking proper precautions in other aspects of their daily lives.

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Oh absolutely, if numbers continue upward this wouldn't be an issue, we'd just change plans. I'm more thinking if numbers stay low and we maintain the same gathering limits without going into another lockdown. While it doesn't have to be a huge celebration if it comes down to it, I do want to have some kind of reception considering our wedding party spent money on getting the clothes and what not.

And yeah, I'm with you in that I think a small handful of people will make a fuss on having to take a test. I haven't sent my invites yet so I could make it a condition of a yes RSVP but I get how it's frustrating for you.

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Assuming 10/16 is already in your bubble but even if everyone has to get a test, I think your group is small enough that it's manageable.

Its true about the gatherings in many places taking part of this covid when it could have been prevented. The view does make sense to see you way of guests getting tested for the right reasons though it may make them feel uncomfortable in a way. Family would have some feelings towards this though they should know its for the safer side of things happening.

Just out of curiosity, is this going to be made a point on the invitation for your guests to know ahead of time?

I don't think it is a bad idea - especially given the ease of getting a test in most places in Ontario and speed which tests have been coming back - I know some people who have gotten results back same day. I would also recommend people getting tested post-wedding, especially if they interact often with high risk populations.

I feel like (thankfully) people are starting to be more open and accepting about loved ones choosing not to attend for safety reasons, but personally, I would prefer that the people who just don't want to get tested (or just don't want to wear a mask) be among the ones who stay home and zoom in. There are still risks with any gathering, but getting tested would show that your guests at least are taking this pandemic seriously in my opinion.

As much as I would like to implement this, I think first of all if weddings continue to be a source of more Covid numbers the province will just say no more parties period. In which case, FH and I are doing something small with family only and moving on.


Secondly, I don’t think guests will do it (in my opinion). I would hate to be stuck with a bunch of yes RSVPs and have the people not show up because they won’t take the COVID test.
We’re going to keep watching everything closely over the next few months and into next year and if it continues to be bad we’ll just cancel. I feel so badly for all 2020 brides and grooms and 2021 brides and grooms going through all this change and uncertainty.

I honestly like this idea because of peace of mind. I’m having a small wedding (16 people plus 3 vendors) and I’m paranoid. I would be incredibly upset if someone got sick because of me. But at the same time I feel awkward asking my guests to do that.


I’m tempted to ask my photographer and videographer because I know they have been still very busy with weddings.
Let me know what you decide. Hoping the numbers don’t sky rocket in the coming weeks because I may have to ask people to take tests or to cut down my list even further.

Speaking of which, how do you feel about asking your vendors and staff to provide a proof of negative test?

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I get it, which is why I'm not fully decided on going full steam ahead with this plan. I figured, at the very least it weeds out those who are complacent with how covid is handled. And I'm not using the negative tests as means for us to do anything unsafe. We're also not using these results as leverage on the venue or vendors to break the rules for us. I just figured my guests may feel better if I can honestly tell them that all 50 or however many we're allowed have all tested negative in the last 7 days.

And yes, it's pretty obvious that wedding in the news was conducted in an unsafe manner but I have a feeling that many weddings are or were being conducted the same way. It's no secret that weddings bring out a different personality for many people.

Sorry just reread your post and realized you said you realize it wouldn’t be full proof. Sorry about that. My main worry would be that it might give people a false sense of security (for the reasons I listed in my previous reply!) and they might let down their guard.

While it might give you and some of your guests piece of mind, I don't know how full-proof it would be to be honest. I have had the test twice personally. The first time was back in early July when my parents were going to watch our kids. Myself and my parents took the test and then self-isolated completely until we got the results. The results came back within 24 hours. The second time I got the test was more recently because my 1 year old had a fever and wasn't allowed to go back to daycare until he was cleared. This time it took 4 days to get the results. I don't know how realistic it is to ask all your guests to not leave their house for 4 days potentially (or go to work or their children to go to daycare/school). Because even if they leave to do an essential errand that takes 5 minutes, they could potentially get it somewhere. They would literally not be allowed to do anything before and after they get their results until coming to your wedding to make it full-proof. Not to mention, I'm assuming you and your fiance would need to leave the house in the days before your wedding to do pre-wedding last minute things, so unless you're able to do the same as you're requesting of your guests, I don't know I'd feel about it.

That's just my 2 cents with my personal experiences of taking the test though. If you think everyone important to you would be willing and it would put people's minds at ease then go for it. I've said so many times this year that anything goes with Covid weddings lol.

Also, from what I read, the wedding in the news that you're talking about was over a span of 2 days at 4 different locations, which doesn't seem super safe to begin with. So if you are taking things more seriously than that (which it obviously seems like you are based on you asking this question), you would have less of a chance of that happening as is.

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I feel like guests not attending due to worries of covid will be the case for weddings held in the next 6-10 months if the situation stays as is, at least in Ontario/Quebec/Alberta/BC. I'm already expecting a handful of people not attending for that reason and we won't hold it against them.

I'm still toying with the idea of asking guests to test (and to bring their lab approved results instead of just taking their word as is that they're clear). Our wedding is still a few months away (both original and postponed date) and we'll play by ear on how things look like closer to Christmas. My original thought on this is to give ourselves and attendees some peace of mind.

Personally I would not feel comfortable gathering if the numbers were high enough in my area to require testing before attending an event. I live in NB where you need 2 symptoms to be eligible for a covid test. That being said we have 2 active cases and less than 200 since our first in March. Even with so few cases being in populated areas like stores now makes me anxious and for me the idea of a relying on other people to be honest about the results of an invasive test would not be enough for me to attend. I feel like if you're that worried, have a smaller party with the most important people.

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Yeah I mean technically I think you can still go and they'll test you, but the government isn't recommending it unless you have symptoms - even if you've been in contact with someone who has tested positive! I've heard it's because asymptomatic people are likely to have a false negative test and it may give people a false sense of security.

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That's crazy that BC is still only testing symptomatic people! We changed that in Ontario a few months ago as soon as asymptomatic carriers were proven and since we have drive thru centres, the only reason to not get tested would be if someone was too lazy to do it.

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Yeah, I figured a small handful might be turned off by the idea but considering the ease in which you can get tested in Ontario now - it's as easy as getting a McDonald's drive-thru - I think I'm okay with losing anyone who refuses this request for the sake of safety for my loved ones.

I think you need to do whatever will make you comfortable in hosting a large group of people. If I was in your situation I would likely ask everyone to isolate as much as possible in the week or two leading up to the wedding (obviously if people have to work or go to school they have to go - I mean more like avoid non-essential gatherings or trips to stores/restaurants/bars/etc) and take a test within a few days of the wedding. I would also absolutely insist that if anyone has any symptoms they are not allowed to come.

Here in BC we're technically not supposed to get tested unless we have symptoms so I'm not sure whether we'd be able to go get a test to confirm we are negative. However we are having a very small ceremony with immediate family only (10 adults including me and my partner and two babies) and we will be asking everyone to isolate as much as they reasonably can in the 2 weeks before the wedding. I just don't think our wedding is more important than the health of our families (and our officiant and photographer) and I would feel so guilty if anyone became sick or died because they attended our wedding.

It’s definitely not a bad idea. I think it may cause you to lose some wedding guests; not everyone may be willing to get tested. I think if you have a smaller guest count it would be do-able. I’m sure many would appreciate how seriously you take the situation!