Curious September 2020 Alberta

Males in the bridal party?

Taya, on 10/March/2019 at 12:46 Posted in Plan a wedding

Has anyone had a wedding where you had males in your bridal party?

I don't have a lot of female friends and was thinking about asking my brother to be in my wedding party. We have been close since we moved out together about 4 years ago. I'm not sure if he should be wearing the same things as my fiancees groomsmen or something more like what my other 2 bridesmaids are wearing. I'm also not sure about the bachelorette as he is my brother and somethings he just shouldn't be subjected to about his sister!




  • Kaisha
    Super March 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kaisha ·

    I had a male and 2 females on my side and my husband had 2 females on his side. My man wore a grey suit to match my husband but lilac tie to match my girls. My husband wore a plum tie to match his girls.

  • Candace
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Candace ·
    So we are having our male friend be our flower girl, and I was going to have a man of honour. What we had decided for them was that they would wear the same thing as the groomsmen (black suit, white shirt, purple tie) with the addition of a purple vest so that they were a little more purple to match the bridesmaids all purple dresses. It’s a very simple but effective way to differentiate them. You don’t have to differentiate them at all though and they can just match the groomsmen exactly
  • Jillian
    Frequent user September 2020 Ontario
    Jillian ·

    I am having my brother in law on my side. He has been in my life for 12 years, longer than some of my friends. He will most likely go to the bachelor party and not the bachelorette, and I am giving him the option to get ready with the groomsmen or us girls. As far as suites, I think he will just wear the same thing as the other groomsmen, maybe a different dress shirt. And he will sit on my side of the head table. Hope that helps!

  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·

    My FH is having a best woman, so you can definitely have a brides man! I'd still have him wear a suit, but as suggested, make him stand out from the groomsmen so people know he's on your side!

    As for the bachelorette, you could always have it in parts: have dinner and then get onto the more "raunchier" parts of the night. I could see it being different if he was a close friend, like in Paige's case, but since it's your brother, he might elect so sit out some parts of it.

  • Tori
    Featured October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·

    I say to go for it! As for what to wear - I would say obviously still a suit, but whatever colour the BM's dresses are match it to a tie he can wear.

  • Peggy
    Super May 2019 Alberta
    Peggy ·

    I have a brides-man! It's awesome. He's doing all the bridal party stuff (helping with my bridal shower, will be there in the AM when we get ready and said he'll play 'gofer' for the ladies as they get their hair and makeup done, and deliver my gift to the groom, etc). He will be splitting his time between the bachelor and bachelorette parties (they are on the same night, two weeks before the wedding). Dinner with the bachelorette, then on to the bachelor party, leaving the girls to get wild!

  • Stephanie
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
    100%!!!! My friend last year was a grooms woman for a groom! And it was amazing! The bridesmaids were in green dresses and the groomsmen were in grey pants and white shirts, she work a grey skirt and white shirt to match the boys instead of the girls and it was amazing! So I'd say if you want your brother on your team go for it! But I would say try to match him to the others on your party instead of matching the groomsmen!
  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·

    Brides Man is always a new way to incorporate ways of a wedding party member. I do agree with going with the groomsmen colour suits. However, I do see the same colour suit with the bridesmaids colour shirt and tie to corporate your side of the party. It will be different yet nice.

    I do remember my brother (long time friend I have known and about some personal things we talked about the rest our friends aren't aware about) being on my side. He had come out of the closet to us his second family just about a month ago and introduced his bf to us (my husband and I) first and then the rest of the gang.

    The bachelorette party can be fun for him if he feels comfortable being there. He feels he doesn't want to hear what happens with his sisters details or dirty secrets.

  • Paige
    Frequent user June 2019 Manitoba
    Paige ·
    My “maid of honour” is my gay best friend. He’ll be dressed the same as the groomsmen but stand on my side. This works especially well because the guys will be wearing a purple button up, and the girls will have purple cardigan shrugs over their dresses.

    My MOH will be at the bridal shower, bachelorette as well as staying with us girls in a hotel the night before the wedding. It’s definitely different because he’s gay but I would say it’s no problem to include guys.

    You could always have him around for parts of the bachelorette party and then when it gets to things that he wouldn’t be comfortable around, he could head home. Definitely depends what you plan to do. He could also skip everything and still stand with you on your wedding day.
  • Taya
    Curious September 2020 Alberta
    Taya ·
    View quoted message

    Thank you!

    This is a big help!

  • Hélène
    Devoted September 2019 Alberta
    Hélène ·

    I picked my attendants based on who I wanted there when the chips were down. If things are going wrong in my marriage, who would I go to and who would be there to support me and my marriage? If your brother is one of those people, absolutely include him as a 'bride's man'.

    As for what to wear, you could have him wear what the groomsmen are wearing with a different colour or pattern of tie/suit, or you could tie his colours into what the bridesmaids are wearing, if it's different than the groomsmen. You could also make the distinction with flowers, by giving him a different boutonnière than the groomsmen.

    As for the bachelorette, entirely up to you! I agree, there are things my brother does not need to know about his sister!

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