Newbie November 2019 Ontario

Can I ask my bridesmaid to bustle her train?

Jane, on 14/June/2019 at 17:05 Posted in Wedding fashion

I asked my bridesmaids to get long dresses within a range of different shades but otherwise told them they should get whatever style they love. They all bought dresses that met those criteria but one of the dresses is WAY more showy that the rest. Apart from being low-cut and sparkly (which on its own is a lot but something I can live with), it has a train. This feels like an aggressive choice to me. Is a train too much for a bridesmaid? Can I ask her to bustle her dress?



  • Stephanie
    Curious October 2020 Ontario
    That's definitely ok to ask! You're supposed to be the center of attention, not her! It would've been nice of her to at least check with you before buying it, but since she didn't and you gave her the freedom of picking and buying her own dress, the least she can do is bustle the train for you. Even for a MOH dress that's a little extra. Stay firm, even though it's her dress, it's YOUR day! She's a part of YOUR day 馃槉
  • Bianca
    Featured August 2019 Ontario

    Definitely ask her to bustle her train. You're supposed to be the centre of attention (with your FS); not her and her train.

  • Becky
    Featured September 2019 Ontario

    I agree with Allison and its definitely not something thats a big ask

  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario

    I definitely think it's ok to ask her to bustle. As the bride, your dress should be the only one with a train! It sounds like your FH's sister could be jealous her brother is getting married before her so she bought the most showy bridesmaid dress - Good luck talking to her!

  • J
    Newbie November 2019 Ontario
    I wasn鈥檛 sure if I was overreacting. Thanks for the support, ladies! She鈥檚 my fiance鈥檚 sister so I think it鈥檚 going to be a tough discussion And future MIL is definitely going to push back. Wish me luck!! Haha
  • Erin
    Featured May 2020 Ontario
    Ya, that is just beyond ridiculous for her to think that it would be okay for her dress to have a train. Definitely you are in the right to ask her to bustle it.
  • Tori
    Featured October 2019 Manitoba
    I agree with Casey. Completely in your right to ask your BM to bustle it. Not sure how she figured the low plunge and sparkles were okay but surely she can't think that having a train is normal or ok
  • Casey
    Featured October 2019 Ontario
    I don鈥檛 think I have ever seen a bridesmaid with a train on her dress. Seems a bit odd for me. I would ask her to bustle it for sure. Especially if yours has a train, you should be the only one that has one!

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