Liarra
Frequent user February 2020 Ontario

Bridal Shower Gift Opening

Liarra, on 10/September/2019 at 15:29 Posted in Before the wedding
Just curious as to what everyone is doing for their bridal shower gift situation. Most that I’ve been to the bride opens the gifts in front of the guests and someone jaunts down who gave what for thank you cards later on....

I don’t want anyone feeling uncomfortable or like they didn’t give “enough or as much as” another person so I’m considering doing the gift opening after everyone has left with just my mom and bridal party perhaps.

When I floated the idea to my mom she was not having any of it. She said she’d never seen that done and if people are bringing gifts they want to see you open them not just sit around and chat all day. I think it’s just a difference in “the times” older women are more traditional whereas I feel millennials aren’t.

What did everyone else do? If you didn’t open them what type of activities did you do to keep people entertained?

thanks !
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23 Comments

  • Liarra
    Frequent user February 2020 Ontario
    Liarra ·
    View quoted message
    That is a great way to kind of ease the crowd after the opening so funny! And yes you’re right; most of my guest are 50+ and will probably have stories or want to see me open the gifts. Someone else mentioned doing it throughout the party as people presented them to you or as you spoke to people and then displaying it on a table so others can see. I may lean in that direction then it’s not such a show.
  • Kate
    Newbie November 2019 Quebec
    Kate ·

    As much as it felt awkward, I opened my gifts with everyone there- and everyone had stories about the gifts they bought me (that they have one, or they got one when they got married, etc) and wanted to share them. Also, my aunts played a game where they would write down my responses as I opened everything- and added "In the bedroom" after each quote.

    After all the gifts were opened, they read it back and everyone almost peed themselves laughing. That game helped remove some of the awkward feelings post gift opening and moved the shower forward.

    Game wise, all of the women had to write down their favourite/ first memory of me and then I had to guess who's story was who's (....there was a lot of laughter at this shower!)

    I think people like having their gifts opened- partly because showers were traditionally a way for women to share knowledge with the bride-to-be, and the gifts are a way of setting the Bride up materially and mentally for marriage.

  • Rachael
    Super October 2019 Ontario
    Rachael ·
    View quoted message
    I second this. I’m not the type to want to open presents in front of everyone, but I had a small bridal shower so it wasn’t as awkward as it could’ve been. If you’d like to avoid it, speak with the person hosting your bridal shower ahead of time!
  • Erin
    Super September 2019 Ontario
    Erin ·

    I opened all my presents with everyone there. My guests all wanted to see what I got - especially my reaction when I opened their own gift. I know it's a bit awkward (I didn't LOVE it and I don't have problems being the centre of attention), but it is what it is, how it goes, and what people want. If you want to do it a different way, though, that's totally your call! You have to do what you're comfortable with! Find a compromise with your mom.

  • Rayanne
    Featured February 2021 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
    I personally would rather not go to a shower where everything is opened. I'd tell your bridal party to tell anyone who wanted to be there for opening their present you would do that with them before they leave. I think most people would be glad to not sit there, especially if you are having a large shower.
  • Nadia
    Newbie September 2020 Ontario
    Nadia ·
    My shower will be next spring/summer but we had quite a few weddings to attend this year and recently I have seen a couple people do the no wrapping paper gifts all just set on a long table. If you’re curious, go up and look at the card.
    I liked it because you could tell from your table that the bride-to-be got plenty of neat items on her list but saving paper and time and not a huge announcement made of every gift or who it’s from. Most people would rather enjoy their food and socialize than go up and snoop at who got what. I am really considering going this route for mine.
  • Amanda
    Frequent user July 2020 Ontario
    Amanda Online ·

    I completely agree with you on that! I am the type of person who would hate to open gifts in-front of everyone.

    If you are doing a shower with gifts that would be harder as you will have lots of gifts to open. Personally I am doing a monetary shower, so I will only be receiving envelops which of course I would not open in front of anyone.

    I would suggest to try and get your Mom to understand because if you feel uncomfortable for your guest, that means you will feel uncomfortable opening the gifts as well.

    I hope it all works out none the less!!

  • Ashley
    Devoted August 2020 Ontario
    Ashley ·

    As a guest to MANY bridal showers i hate sitting there watching people open gifts..... i feel like the older people want that but the younger people (and im talking like 40 and less) want fun interactive shower games. i just hate sitting there for 2 hours watching someone open more plates and pretending theyre so excited. however this is just my opinion. do what YOU want to do and no one else. its your shower and your gonna be the only one who remembers it. you cant please everyone!

  • Liarra
    Frequent user February 2020 Ontario
    Liarra ·
    View quoted message
    That’s a great compromise!
  • Tori
    Newbie June 2020 Ontario
    Tori ·
    I have had a similar debate with my mom. She doesn’t care personally but she thinks people will be put off by me not opening gifts. Whereas I find the gift opening the most boring part of the shower!

    I haven't had my shower yet but a family friend made a suggestion and I think we will do that instead. Essentially at the beginning of the shower my mom will announce that everyone is free to bring up their gift to me throughout the shower and I will open it with them and then place it on a “gift table” so everyone can see them. There won’t be an official sit down and open gifts time but at any point during the mingling/ eating times people can bring their gift to me. I feel like is sorta the middle ground to not opening them and the sit down and everyone stares are you opening them.
  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·

    We did a gift card bridal shower - meaning everyone got gift cards in lieu of actual gifts since I had to fly to and from my shower in my hometown. I ended up opening all the cards in front of people and kept the gift card with the greeting card so didn't have to track. The hosts (my mom and her friend) got my a physical gift each, so I had 2 gifts to open along with the gift cards.

    That being said, it felt awkward on my end to just be opening envelopes in front of people and most people just talked amongst themselves as I did. I feel like in my situation, it would've been better to open them later so there could be more me mingling with guests, but other than that, the day went smoothly.

    As a guest to bridal showers, I find the gift opening part the most boring IMO and I'm glad people at my shower continued mingling as I opened gifts. I'm definitely "pro-open gifts later" which I think is a generational issue, but maybe explain to your mom you want to spend more time with your guests at the shower over opening gifts then.

  • Kelsie
    Featured July 2020 Ontario
    Kelsie ·
    View quoted message

    I've never heard of a charity shower before! What a super cool concept! Thats an amazing idea Caitlyn!!

  • Caitlyn
    Featured January 2020 Ontario
    Caitlyn ·

    We won't be opening gifts at my shower as I'm having a charity showerso if people want to give they will either donate ahead of time or give money in a card that I will pass along to the charity.

    I honestly find it boring to just sit around and watch someone open gifts, and as a gift giver it can be anxiety inducing when the bride opens one gift which is an expensive Dyson vacuum and then they open your's and it's say $25 worth of baking pans.

    One option I've heard of is a display shower. if you don't want to open gifts in front of everyone then ask each person to bring their gift unwrapped and they are placed on a table for people to see. That allows the gifts to be seen, but you don't take up time opening them and have everyone watching you.

  • Stephanie
    Frequent user July 2020 Ontario
    Stephanie ·

    I have seen it done both ways. As a guest it is pretty boring watching gifts/envelopes getting opened over and over.

    I suppose it could depend on how big your bridal shower is. A smaller guest count it might be more practical but if it's a large shower I would wait and do it after.

    People can also choose to stay around after to watch you open gifts if that's something they would like and or enjoy and then others can leave without feeling guilty like they left too soon.

  • Michael
    Newbie October 2020 Alberta
    Michael ·
    If I've travelled I'm not hanging around for you to open presents. That's boring as hell. We aren't having one. We are just doing a breakfast instead. Something everyone can enjoy
  • K
    Frequent user July 2024 Ontario
    Katrine ·
    I would rather open the gifts on my own, not at the bridal shower and as a guest, I hate watching brides open gifts. It’s not entertaining. I’d rather have fun and chat.

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