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AJ Juras
Newbie September 2020 British Columbia

Bridal shower?

AJ Juras, on August 14, 2018 at 16:02 Posted in Before the wedding 0 14
Who’s had a bridal shower? What is the point in the bridal shower? Do you recommend having one?

14 Comments

Latest activity by Holly, on August 19, 2018 at 09:24
  • Holly
    Frequent user September 2018 Ontario
    Holly ·
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    I didn't want one and my friends and family supported that. I'm 34 and my FH is 36. We both had our own homes before buying a house together so we had 2 of everything we needed. I just didn't feel right about asking people to throw me a shower and give me things I don't need.

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  • Jennifer
    Curious September 2018 Ontario
    Jennifer ·
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    I had mine a couple weeks ago, planned by my mom and sister. My FH and i have lived together for almost 2 years so we already have stuff for our home. I felt really guilty after my party because all the people that were invited were from my side except for my to be mother and sister in law so none of his family were there. On another note, we cant afford to invite extended family to the actual wedding and my mom invited people to the shower who were not invited to the wedding....awkward. I felt super uncomfortable talking about weddiing plans and accepting gifts from people who i didnt invite.
    All that being said, it was really nice seeing everyone and getting some new stuff to replace thift store stuff we fot when we moved in together. I know every situation is different so i would say go for it.
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  • Meagan
    Frequent user October 2021 Nova Scotia
    Meagan ·
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    I threw one for my best friend when I was her MOH and it was tons of fun! We did a mimosa bar and had Disney love song games, a slideshow of tons of pictures of her from the attendees... It was great! I also built a registry totally separate from the wedding one so that she got gifts that SHE wanted, not just stuff for her and her FH. She loved it and I wouldn't have traded it for the world! I hope that my bridal party wants to throw one when it's my turn lol

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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Most that my mom has attended for Indian weddings jave been big to include everyone you know and family too. Saves on catering twice the amount.
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  • Jessie
    Expert September 2018 Ontario
    Jessie ·
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    I had 2 bridal showers. 1 for my side and 1 for his side. They were really nice and I loved having them. It gives you a chance to see the people you don't get to see all that much. It's always nice to feel pampered and loved! I totally recommend it.

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  • Marcia
    Super August 2018 Manitoba
    Marcia ·
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    I've had a bridal shower, I really liked it is was a high tea planned by my aunties and my bridesmaids. It was a great time for all the ladies to get together, the married ones gave me advice on being a wifey, and I had a registry so it was nice to get gifts since we just bought a new house. I would recommend having one only if your not planning it.

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  • Kaisha
    Super March 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kaisha ·
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    I did not want one at all and really thought I would get out of it as we live away from my family. I ended up having to go visit my family so they through a surprise shower. As much as I didn't want one it was really fun to visit with all my family.

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  • Katie
    Newbie September 2018 Nova Scotia
    Katie ·
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    I actually had two the first time I got married, one with family and one with my parents church. We were just moving in, didn't have much house stuff and it made sense to have the support and love shown to us that way.

    Needless to say I'm getting married again (to the best FH ever) in just shy of 6 weeks, and it took me a long time to be able to say, no I don't think I'd want a shower this time. We've been living together for almost three year and are in a one bedroom apartment so we don't need the household support. My mom didn't press to throw me on, but my MIL has been, so I'm going to ask them to party with and support us in a different way.
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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    Don't get me started on bridal showers! Not that I'm opposed for them but it is the bride's family and friends showering her with gifts for her new married life. I'm also in a unique situation:

    Most of my family and friends are a good airplane ride from Thunder Bay to Toronto for me so having a shower in Southern Ontario is a bit of a stretch for me (unless I drive down, taking at least 4 days for one afternoon).

    That being said, me mom and honourary mom (My mom's friend I've known forever, basically my second mom), really want to have one for me. I agreed since I'm the only daughter and my second mom has no daughters and are super pumped to host. Yes, I am dreading trying to figure out how to haul the potential gifts to Thunder Bay and I'm heavily considering driving down for the wedding for this exact reason (that's another conversation). I already told my bridesmaids I didn't want a shower so they only are planning a a bachelorette, which I'm cool with.

    Long story short; bridal showers are handy for brides who may be moving in with their FH after the wedding or younger couples who aren't established in life yet. Also would be handy for the bride to be within reasonable driving distance from the shower.

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  • Naomi
    Curious September 2018 British Columbia
    Naomi ·
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    I had mine in early July. My best friend and my grandma both really wanted to plan a bridal shower for me, but since my group of friends is small they joined forces and planned one together. My friend sent out the invites, handled the RSVPs, and helped with decorations. My grandma hosted it at her house and organized all the games. My sisters helped out with setting up and taking down. All the guests brought a gift for me and a treat to share for the potluck-style refreshments. It was a lot of fun for everyone.

    My mom and sisters hadn't met my FH's mom and sisters, so it was a good opportunity for them to meet and get to know each other. Plus several of my close friends were there and got to meet everyone. I was worried that I'd get a bunch of gifts that I didn't need, but that wasn't a problem at all (I think because everyone there knew my FH and I really well and had an idea of what we could use).

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  • Melissa
    Frequent user September 2018 Quebec
    Melissa ·
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    I had mine last month. I had a lot of fun, but mixed feelings as to whether I’d recommend one.

    We already live together and we didn’t need anything. However, the invitations did suggest a minimum contribution. I wasn't involved in the planning at all and big caveat: it likely isn’t proper etiquette to ask for a contribution.

    That aside, whatever we received in contributions we put towards the wedding and people were beyond generous.

    BUT, showers can be expensive to throw and require a lot of planning on the part of family and your bridal party, if you have one. Afterwards, I learnt that there were differences of opinion over details, responsibilities and expectations. It caused tension between people I love so in that regard, I almost felt like it wasn’t worth it because impressions were formed and may last.
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  • Allison
    Newbie September 2018 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    The point used to be to "shower the bride with presents" and household items to begin your new household together. My FH and I have lived together for 4 years now, so instead of a bridal shower, my mom is hosting a "Honeymoon Fundraiser BBQ" instead. I recently went to a shower where the bride asked for cash instead of gifts and it was really awkward because there wasn't really anything to do. Usually, the bride opens all of the gifts in front of everyone, but it was just weird for her to open cards of cash in front of her guests, so there were a few games and that was it.

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  • Clarissa
    Expert October 2018 Saskatchewan
    Clarissa ·
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    The point of a bridal shower is to “shower the bride to be with gifts and things for the new one and life ahead”. Usually there are a few games, usually everyone shares a piece of advice or tips for bride (marriage, happiness, cooking, date ideas), and of course snacks. But basically it’s a chance for the ladies in the family or community to come together and celebrate for an afternoon. Depending on the region they are sometimes themed and who is invited varies depending on where you live and what the customs out there are.

    As for having one well it really depends on each person. If your set up in life and you would rather cash instead of physical gifts I would say skip it as it seems a bit much to me to ask people for a money shower.

    I had a small one back home. Family and close friends of my parents (some who aren’t able to travel to the wedding) wanted a chance to celebrate the day with me. It was a great chance to get together with family and friends for an afternoon.

    My FSIL is planning to have one out here where we live because a lot of the community members have been asking about one for us. Out here it’s a chance for the larger community to come together to celebrate the couple and in my case they all want a chance to welcome me into the community and get to know me a bit more.
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  • Sara
    Devoted October 2018 Ontario
    Sara ·
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    I'm having mine on Saturday.

    It's supposed to be a party where your close female friends and family shower you with attention and possibly presents.

    I think it's a personal thing, my aunt is hosting mine so it wasn't my 'idea' I just said thank you.

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